Toxic Relationship

Assalamualaikum and hello readers.. 

Baru-baru ni aku ada involve dgn situation that I can label it as "TOXIC RELATIONSHIP". Tapi jangan risau. Bukan my relationship sebab aku tak ada bofriend ('No Men No Cry' tapi hakikatnya berakar bontot menunggu prince charmingku). For someone who dont know ape itu toxic relationship, meh nak bagitau. Toxic Relationship is any relation that is unfavorable to you or others. Senang cerita relationship yang tak healthy. It can be from both or only one person. Now I tell you my story about friend of mine yang involve in this kind of relationship. My friend's name is Capik (bukan nama sebenar) and his girlfriend's name Emma (bukan nama sebenar). 

Aku kenal Emma since orientation masa degree dekat Kuching, Sarawak. Kitorang tak kawan rapat pon sebab tak boleh nak 'click' bila lepak if you know what I mean. So one day she wanna join me for dinner and I said why not. That time si Capik and also few other friends also ada. So masa ni la diorang dua ni kenal and exchange phone number but they didnt contact frequent as far as I know la kan. but I mention to him once 'I support you if you like someone but not her'. I dont know why, she kinda look innocent but something bout her that I dont like. Since korang semua dah tau macam mana diorang kenal, I skip the beginning part. 

Diorang start diorang punya relationship masa cuti semester. I knew from Capik about their relationship. So I asked him how they end up in a relationship. My friend said during semester break, she's having problem with her boyfriend and tell my friend all her problem (she actually told me once also about her problem but I just listen). So my friend kononnya jadi pendengar setia keluh kesah minah ni la. sebab dah banyak dengar dia pon jadi kesian and dari kesian timbul sayang. Then he mintak couple with that girl. 

People used to say that first 2/3 month is the honeymoon time. All went well and happy. After Semester break end, I went back to hostel and as usual me and my friend lepak for dinner. Then she called but he didnt wanna pick up. I feel suspicious but dont wanna ask. Then after few weeks I decided to ask bout their relationship. Then I knew that they having problem and I kinda figured she's the source of this problem. 

Here's why:

1. She texted me asking where is Capik and I said I dont know cause I have event to organised at that time. I ask why dont she call him and she said she did but Capik didnt pick up. She insist wanna meet me and gave kinda weird reason. she said she wanna meet me to give sourvenirs that she bought in Singapore. I did tell her to pass it to Capik instead sebab kitorang memang akan jumpa kat campus tapi dia insist nak bagi jugak. Mesti korang confuse kan sebab mula-mula I mention that we are studying in the same uni. and hoorayy to sesapa yang teka betul, she quit after 1 year study. Back to my story, I said "fine" and told her where am I. She came and give me all those stuff and maybe she figured out that Capik not with me then she left. hmmmmmmmmm...........Lu pikir la sendiri.......

2. She texted me and comment on his others kawan perempuan's instagram post saying nonsense like 'He smile a lot with you guys but not with me", "What he felt at the moment?", and many more. I'm not sure bout you guys but if I am the girlfriend, I will ask that to my boyfriend and solve it just the two of us. Will not involve third person especially when the third person is close to one of them. 

3. She came to his place in the middle of the night just to make sure he's back home before midnight. Can you guys imagine? like wtf! Is he 16 years old kid? He's already in his mid 20's okay. If she did that after they went out together of course I understand but she did that whenever he didnt reply to her text. If she figured hes not home yet she will text me asked for him like am I his nanny? Duhhhh he have his own life btw. 

4. I become the bad guy in their relationship suddenly. I knew from Capik, my name always become a topic when they fight because I'm close with Capik. She label me as someone who trying to rampas boyfriend dia. pfffttt..so ridiculous.. (macam la hensem sangat boyfriend dia..)

5. Suddenly my name appears in her whatsapp story which of course lead to the negativity side. I'm impressed! I asked my friend what the hell happen. Then he said she posted that just because he dont wanna go breakfast with her (Blur...........). Apa connection dengan aku pulak kan? korang gaduh korang dua dah la. nak libatkan aku kenapa. lmao. 

and there's many other things happen for the past few months. Banyak lagi benda yang dia buat that I dont wanna mention here sebab too much to process. To make it simple for you guys to understand. Korang pegi youtube and watch 'Girlfriend Aku Dari Neraka' and see Sakinah's character. Emma is 50% of that perangai. 

Maybe some of you guys tertanya-tanya kenapa tak break up je kan? senang. Tapi susah for him la cause she threaten him if he wanna break up she will suicide or kacau all of his kawan perempuan in whatsapp and instagram or come to his place in the middle of the night just to cry her ass off. I can say she did many thing that I didnt expect. 

If you guys ask for my opinion, I would say that both of them salah but the way she handle it probably too much. Now people around him talk behind his back about their relationship and sometimes they gossip bout them in front of his face. If aku jadi dia, memang malu wey. 

Advised from me for people out there:

1. Jangan overjealous/oversuspicious/overreact and macam-macam lagi yang over la especially girls. Guys also got their limits to handle girls. Dont torture them with your ridiculous attitude just to pleased yourself. 

2. Do not involve other person when korang gaduh because you never know what that third person capable of. Nanti takut malu sendiri. 

3. If you are wrong admit it. Dont put the blame on others. Everyone make mistake. 

4. THINK before you DO something. Not the other way around. 

I think that's all for my story. If you guys have any experience on toxic relationship boleh la kongsi sama. Maybe we can figure how to overcome this issues. I doubt it (here come my negative thought hahahahahaha). Till next time and thank for read my blog. ^ ^

ANNOYING FRIEND - Contoh perangai annoying & Cara nak handle

Hi Guys..I want to share with you guys about this topic which is ANNOYING FRIEND. Dalam banyak-banyak kawan yang korang ada, mesti akan ada sorang yang perangai dia annoying gila. Bila dia ada je mesti rasa malas nak layan, mood xada, and macam-macam lagi lah..If you guys ada kawan yang macam ni, I felt sorry for you all (huhuhuhu).

Contoh-contoh perangai yang I feel it's so annoying is:

1. Too clingy (asyik nak berkepit je 24/7).

Urghhh..so annoying..korang mesti tau kan ape 'Clingy". Maksudnya asyik nak berkepit je dengan kita 24/7. Dah macam kembar yang melekat pulak. Tapi kalau kawan-kawan yang selalu lepak or hang out dengan kita are not consider a clingy person okay! One thing I've notice about clingy person ni, dia mesti akan rasa takut ter'left out' from the group. So, nak avoid that situation, dia akan follow je kita kemana-mana kita pergi walaupon susah untuk dia. Walaupun dia ada kelas in between time kita nak pergi mana-mana tu, dia still nak join after her/his class walaupun jauh.

2. Suka menyibuk

OMG!!!! yang ni lagi annoying. Dia punya tahap menyibuk tu, dah macam mami jarum. Mami jarum pon boleh angkat bendera putih dengan dia. semua benda dia nak tau. Kalau boleh from A to Z dia nak tau. HELLO!!! setiap org pon ada private space okay. Tak kan la semua benda nak kena bagitau dia pulak.

3. Spesis Kera

Org yang spesis kera ni maknanya yang suka kebas makanan kawan dia tapi bila makanan dia, kedekut taik hidung masin. Spesis ni memang layak bagi penampar sikit. hahahahhaha

Ada banyak lagi perangai yang annoying ni tapi 3 kat atas ni je la yang aku rasa paling ANNOYED bagi aku. So, korang dah tau kan ciri-ciri org yang annoying ni. Kalau dah tau, jom I give you an idea on how to handle this kind of people with no hard feeling. Korang jangan xnak kawan dengan dia pulak bila dapat tau dia clingy. Try to give them a second chance. Everyone deserve a second chance (ceeeewaaahhhhh).

Ada dua cara yang aku boleh suggest,

1. Try to make them realize their mistake with your body language (cth: tak invite dia hang out). Memang dengar macam kasar tapi it work. Sebab bila dia dapat tau kita keluar lepak xajak dia, mesti dia rasa pelik. Baru la dia akan fikir what's wrong with her/him.

2. Kalau tak berkesan, boleh try to have a serious conversation. This method are more effective and easier to settle. Tapi jangan sampai gaduh pulak. serious conversation means heart to heart conversation. Bagitau dia secara jujur yang korang rasa rimas dengan perangai dia yang annoying tu.

Korang dah tau ciri-ciri orang annoying and cara nak handle this kind of people. So kepada sesiapa yang ada kawan macam ni, all the best la (sebab I know how it feel to have an annoying friend..LOL). The most important thing is, don't give up on your friend cause friendship is a wonderful kind of relationship.

*The point above are from my opinion. I understand if ada sesiapa yang xsetuju sebab different people has a different way of thinking. Cheers.